What may be the only entry of 2012

Hi everyone. It's Andrew. It's 2012. She's done nothing. She has absolutely no excuse. Her iPad has a voice dictation feature which is how I'm doing this. I asked her about it and she said there are almost too many options for blogging and too much to catch up on and too many pictures to find off her camera and download and she's overwhelmed. I told her we call those first-world problems.

So let me catch you up on what's happened since . . . May? May 2011? Dude, I don't even remember half of it. And she changed her Facebook password so I can't even figure it out that way. Whatever. Going from memory.

Well first of all, in May, we went on a little vacation to Galveston. We really just drove in our SUV but Mom kept saying we were "on vacation." I was so confused. I didn't know if we were supposed to be on something that we weren't already on or if she was just crazy or what. We went to a hotel. I was having a great time but Mom said she might throw me out the window if I didn't shut up and go to bed. I looked at the clock and it still said 11 at the beginning and I'm usually up when it says 11 at the beginning so I really don't know what her problem was. So really why we were at that place was to go to this other place called Moody Gardens. I kept asking her where the garden was and she kept telling me all the buildings altogether were called Moody Gardens. That made absolutely no sense to me. So we went in one of the buildings and they had fish. A whole bunch of fish. That was cool. I ran around and looked at fish. We went in another building and I don't even remember what they had. The best part of the whole trip was the bus that took us around from the parking lot of our hotel to the building. I could've ridden that thing all day long. The driver's name was Tom and I saw Mom give him some money at the end because we had ridden for about 45 minutes. We just went around and around. Later, Mom told me that she would have saved the money on our admission tickets and just paid $10 for a tip if she had known what I would really want to do. I asked her when she stopped paying attention to what I like to do. Since when was it a secret that I like to ride on things?

Here's what Moody Gardens looks like.

This is what I did when I couldn't ride the bus.

This is a picture I took. Eye of the beholder.

When we got home I went to a park and a very nice lady named Sara Nugent took pictures of me. I suppose she heard about the blog death and felt sorry for me that my childhood has become largely undocumented. Aren't they nice?

Mom calls this my contemplative look.  I call it my I'm-happy-I-got-a-stick look.

Here's Sivi doing something to me before she broke her bones (see below).

My awesome bike. Grandpa thinks he's keeping me safe but I think he's just slowing me down.

Nobody told me I couldn't make funny faces so I did.

"Look deeply into my eyes."

"Go ahead.  Make my day."

"I shall wiggle my ears and you shall like it."

This is my Mean Train face.  That's one of the trains from this movie at Grandpa and Sivi's house called The Little Engine That Could.  Apparently there's some book with that name and people like it and it has a nice message and doesn't make anyone want to tear their ears off like the movie does.  I prefer the movie.

Don't know what I was going for here but I like it.

In June Grandpa came to school with me for Dads and Donuts.  I guess "Grandpas and Donuts" doesn't have the same ring. I don't care because I had my Grandpa and I got a lot of donuts. I made him a hat.

In July I went to a restaurant to celebrate Sivi's birthday and I ate her dessert.

August is when Mom went on another vacation and did not invite me. She went to Vancouver. Or at least she tried to. People told me she missed her flight to Vancouver and had to go to someplace called Calgary and then go to Vancouver and I really don't know where any of that stuff is. I stayed with Grandpa and Sivi and Grandpa ate ribs.

Here's Mom in at Stanley Park in Vancouver. Whatever.

This is the view from Granville Island. I like islands, Mom.

Here she is on a bus. Perhaps the biggest of her many betrayals.

Later in August she hung out with me.  Proof.

These are my friends Madelyn and Cameron.  They're twins.  They're two years old.  I try to play with them but mostly they just stare at me.

We went to Dewberry Farm a couple of times.  This is what I like to do there.  Ride the trikes.  Ride on the tractor trailer to go out to the pumpkin patch but I don't like to walk around out there too much because there are bugs and stuff under the pumpkins.  Ride the trikes.  Direct other kids how to ride the trikes.  Ride the trikes.

Okay, what else. For Halloween I was a train engineer. The overalls were cool and I guess the hat was okay but I did not care at all for that red thing that Mom made me wear around my neck. 

Later we went to Grandpa's office. By that time I had ditched the hat and red thing. Here's what we talked about.

We had a little party in my neighborhood that Mom and some of the other parents threw. We went from house to house doing stuff. One place we did candy apples. One place we painted pumpkins. At my house we decorated cookies and cupcakes. Mom did not tell me ahead of time that I was not supposed to eat a bunch of cupcakes and cookies before they were decorated. I bet she will next time.


Check out our pumpkins.  Mom was all excited we didn't have to use a knife.  That was the only part I didn't like.

That's my light saber, by the way.  It looks like a bubble wand to some people but I know the truth.

November. November was cool.  It finally was less than 100° outside.  I was doing fun stuff in school. 

I could write stuff.  I made Mom tell me her letters and then I wrote them.  All by myself.

Thanksgiving rocked. Turkey's good. I cooked with Grandpa. And ate a lot of the white stuff.

On Monday after Thanksgiving I fell down the stairs. I wasn't even doing anything bad. I just slipped on my pants. I went rolling and rolling and rolling all the way down the stairs and I stopped on the third stair from the bottom so I didn't crack my head open on the tile. I cried a lot and threw up just a little bit and Mom kept asking me what my name is and who is in our family and what class do I go to and other stuff she really should know by now. 

But the weirdest thing was that the next morning Sivi fell down her stairs too. Except she broke her bones. Her hip bone and her wrist bone. I don't know if she even had any other bones left. She had to go live in the hospital for a while. I went up to visit her. The hospital was the best place ever because they have this fridge there that had milk and juice in little tiny cups and also pudding and graham crackers. When she went home from the hospital they gave her a walker and a cane with four little feet and then a cane with just one foot. I used them all. I also used her grabber that they gave her so she could reach down and pick things up. Sometimes I would throw things down so that I could pick them up with the grabber. After a while she was okay.

The problem with her breaking her bones was that she couldn't come on the cruise with us. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you Mom and I went on a cruise from Christmas to New Year's. Again with that "on" business. As far as I can tell we were on a ship. Mom kept calling it a cruise. I stopped asking after a while. My best part of the cruise was a big train that they had in the lobby. I also really liked some trains that I got for Christmas and took with me. Mom said those trains cost less than $10. And then she started to tell me something about what the cruise costs but then she stopped. She just kind of shook her head. Then she said kind of quietly that she did not learn her lesson from the Galveston trip. They had a kids' place on the cruise that Mom wanted me to go to all the time but I was not interested in it a lot of the time because I just wanted to be with Mom. The thing was I wanted to be with her in our room while we played trains and she said I was a lot to take in 180 square feet. Totally do not know what that means. But I went to the kids' place sometimes and I liked it a lot when I was there but don't tell Mom. Supposedly there are pictures from the cruise but I'm not holding my breath.


And then we just did Mom's birthday. I asked her a whole bunch of times if I could come to her party because I was afraid she'd pull a Vancouver. She said yes. I was ready to fight my way in if I had to but luckily it didn't come to that. We did have a tug of war over a piece of cake and she won. Everybody kept saying she got the first piece because she was the birthday girl. Through tear-filled eyes I told them she was the birthday lady, not the birthday girl. I still didn't get that cake. Grandpa gave me another piece and I guess it was okay but it tasted mostly like betrayal.


OH MY GOD I almost forgot the most important thing in my life or maybe in the history of the world.  Ellie. Ellie is in my class. She was my partner for our dance during the school holiday show. I don't why I never really saw her before, but I'm making up for lost time. I love Ellie. I like to look at her during circle time. She has nice hair and she has a beautiful face. I told Mom that. I mean, I probably still love Mom more, but I don't know. I like to "pretend" (Mom's opinion) that Ellie is in my house with me all the time. She sleeps with me and holds my hand and fixes my blankie. She likes to do all the same things I like to do like trains and chasing and stuff. I heard Mom and my teachers saying that the Ellie fantasy does not bear much resemblance to the Ellie reality because Ellie doesn't actually talk to me. If that's not jealousy, I don't know what is. She is my best girl. I told Mom that, too. Mom asked who my best boy is but I don't have one. I don't need one because I have Ellie.


See her nice hair and beautiful face? Well, I guess you can't really see them very well in this picture because Mom can't angle the camera. Probably jealousy again.

This is me and Caleb. I guess if I have to have a best boy, it's Caleb. We chase each other and then we have an argument and then we play.

Here's my dance.  Mom called it uncontrolled chaos but I know she loved it.  I just love Ellie.

So I'll check back with you all next January.  Love and stuff.